Xmas is just another day, and the best days involve getting smelly and covered in muck.
Max, Bang and myself set off to visit North Ohau Hut for the night. Being cultured I know how to say Ohau. It sounds like “Or Hoe” so just remember “Bro or Hoe” and you’ll be give others the impression that you are refined and educated!
Norh Ohau Hut
It’s a 3 to 4 hour walk in from Poads Road walking up the river. The hut currently has a resident rat in the roof. According to the hut book a dead rat was also found in the water tank back in September. Drinking from the river is probably the better option right now (Unless you see a Shit Weasel Swimming in it!)
Here’s Johnny
There are many things I don’t believe about Xmas. The Idea that a fat man can crawl down a chimney seems even more far fetched than the dribble scribbled in the bible. Of course Pagan Shit Weasels can crawl through tight tunnels 😜
Bath Time
Speaking of being refined Max insisted that I take a bath so I jumped in the river. I’d suggest that DOC should put a warning up saying not to drink from it for a couple of days!
I also went for a swim which is much quicker than walking:
Snowy hut is one of those unofficial huts in the Tararuas, although it is actually marked on the map if you know where to look. I decided to post a last-minute trip to make the most of the good weather on Saturday.
With less than 24 hours notice I was not surprised that I was the only attendee. I’m not sure that the tramper on his knees begging to Satan encouraged people to sign up but anything that involves 666 is Devil territory and not to be taken lightly!
The plan
It turned out to be an easy trip to navigate. Simply follow the DOC path to Waiotauru Forks, then walk up the stream enjoying the sunshine. You could try and avoid the stream to get there, but the river route is certainly the quickest way if you don’t mind getting wet.
Snowy River
And when I say get wet I mean it, there is a gorge that you have to swim up!
Baphomet
There was a black goat at the other end of the Gorge, this hoofed beast was clearly the sign of the Devil. For safe passage a deal should be made that involves sacrificing an animal.
Fortunately, I’d bludgeoned a possum to death the previous week by stamping on its head 10 times. I projected the thought to the goat and it disappeared from sight. With the trade done I could proceed through the gorge.
I double-checked all my dry bags were sealed inside my pack, chucked it in the river and swam upstream pushing it ahead of me.
Looking back at the gorge after a swim
After the gorge, there is a sweet sunny spot that looks good for camping. The grass is short, no doubt thanks to the local feral goats. It’s a good spot to towel off too.
Snowy Hut
Snowy Hut, in all its rustic glory
Just beyond the meadow is Snowy Hut, it’s easy to find.
From here I headed up to the ridge to 666 where I was expecting to find a shrine. Sadly it was unremarkable but I dare say that can be fixed with some time and effort.
Goblin Forest
The route is an easy one to follow and is not really what I call going off track. There is a clearly defined trail to follow up the ridge all the way to the top though a lovely section of Goblin forest.
I arrived at Elder Hut 6 hours after setting off from Otaki Forks to enjoy some fine views and a good sunset.
View from Elder Hut
Day Two
It was a white out and super windy, I procrastinated for 5 minutes about going back via Renata hut, but made the call too tough it out and take a beating going over the tops. If I had anyone else to look after I would have gone the other way as stopping for others in these conditions is simply dangerous.
It was really hard to stand up on Hector I focused all my energy on keeping a good pace and watching where I placed my feet.
I got to Kime Hut at 10:40 where I took an early lunch and enjoyed some much-needed food! After that, I could relax as the conditions eased as I dropped down towards Field hut
Monday I was super tired, my whole body ached and just wanted a rest. I can’t say I’ve ever felt that way after a trip.
Trip Times:
Day One: 11:40 Leave Otaki Forks 13:10 Waiotauru Forks 15:23 Snowy Hut. Dry myself after the swim! 16:49 666 18:31 Join path and find Orange marker 🙂 18:43 Elder Hut
Day Two: 07:50 Leave Elder Hut contemplating if the tops are a good idea as it’s blowing a bastard and a white out! 10:40 Arrive at Kime Hut and have an early lunch. 13:36 Back at Otaki Forks
The Broken Axe Pinnacles are a jagged ridge line that run between the South King (1531) and McGregor (1540) in the Tararuas. The plan was to drive in from Wellington, cross them in one day, then return home.
You never quite know what conditions you’ll face on the tops this time of year. The forecast for Saturday said snow down to 1000 meters. How much snow was already there? How much would fall the day before? It really is guess work until you get up there.
Broken Axe Loop
The image above is from August 2018 when I crossed the Broken Axe Pinnacles in waist deep snow. It was a very hard day and we had to sidle around the gnarly bit as it was simply to dangerous with that much snow.
Anyway, I wanted to go back and cross the full ridge. With the forecast for Sunday looking great it seemed like the ideal time to give it another shot.
I picked Stirling up at 6am and we set off to the Holdsworth Campsite entrance. We took my little sports car as it’s the fastest way to get over the Rimutaka hill road. The more time we had for walking the better.
Whilst we both hoped to be able to get in and out in one day, it was always going to be a challenge, especially if there was deep snow or ice. We decided to take sleeping bags and extra food and leave them in Atiwhakatu hut. This way we had the option of staying if it got difficult.
The Shit Weasel heading up to Baldy
It took us 1 hour and 20 minutes to get the Atiwhakatu hut and dump the overnight gear. On the way in we joked about how much longer a large group would take to get there. Crossing the 1 person swing bridge one at a time was a classic example of faffing around.
We noticed a very plump lady who was walking in the other direction. It was obvious that she was as heavy as both of us combined so we concluded it was safe for both of us to use the bridge at the same time 😜
The Gnarly Bit
We set off to do the loop anticlockwise, mainly because it’s easier to climb up the pinnacles then go down them.
As it turned out the snow was not an issue. It was little more then a dusting and some old patches from a previous dump.
We climbed over without much trouble. Well, I had a bloody knee and Stirling a cut finger, but that’s just part of the deal when playing with a Broken Axe!
Video of the hard part:
It was a hard day, but highly rewarding. We headed back to Wellington and stopped for a beer and a burger whilst watching the 2nd half of the All Blacks game. Win win 😀
A very tired Shit Weasel and Stirling with blood on his face having finished a massive day tramp.
Statistics
According to Stirling’s iPhone: We walked 40KM, 50,000 steps and 500 floors.
Should you consider this trip?
Absolutely, but be realistic about how fit and fast you are.
The meetup group who did a day trip to Atiwhakatu hut the previous day took 5 hour to get there and back. We did this section in 2 hours 40 minutes with overnight gear.
Add an additional 7 plus hours of slogging over some technical ridge-lines along with heaps of climbing. You’ll have very tired legs at the end.
It’s also worth pointing out that a one day southern crossing is an easier option.
Max, Spiderman and Myself set off to the Pines from Wellington at 6am.
Both were really slow and struggled to keep up with me. Ha, to think that these two clowns have a reputation for being quick! Both egos were shattered in under 10 minutes.
Max was already sweating and I could smell his BO from 100 meters away. God I love the smell of putrid trampers. This always causes excitement and I could not help but to get my teeth stuck into the nearest trail marker.
Spiderman and Max were not impressed by this. Max muttered something about teething issues and shoved me into his back pack. He’s such a cruel son of a bitch!
We soon arrived at Mitre Flats hut where we were informed that a group of trampers had set off before us. The lazy bastards had a big head start as they came in the previous night to make it a shorter day.
Regardless, It was decided that we would smash it up the hill and overtake them. This way we could claim the best spots in Tarn Ridge Hut before they arrived.
The Smell of Fear!
It was not long before we stumbled upon some very sheepish looking trampers coming down the hill. I did not need my telepathic skills to know that some of them were scared. And not scared of me I might add. I was still tied up in Max’s backpack so was out of sight.
No I could smell fear, a couple of them had obviously soiled their undergarments. The whiff was strong.
They pretended to be brave and spoke about how it was impossible to stand up in the wind. Max just smirked and kept walking up the hill. He then joked about how WTMC should rename themselves to Wellingtons Timid Mountaineering Club as every trip he meets them in the hills they turn back!
Twas a breeze
Spiderman getting blown away
Spiderman and Max stopped to chat about the wind:
Spiderman 💬
I think there is an 80% chance we’ll have to turn back!
Max 💬
Let’s take the 20% option. You don’t want everyone to know that you’re a big girls blouse do you?
Max was scared of being a failure so was hell bent on pushing on. He has such a big head so turning back was not an option. Especially after all the derogatory comments about the group that used the impossible word! Although deep down he’s a sweetheart with a fragile little ego.
There was wind, and there was snow. The idiots continued to the hut…
Spiderman nearly got blown away, but Max was fine as he’s a fat bastard.
Tarn Ridge Hut
The hut was full…
But not of people. We were the only ones there. It was full of good things.
There was enough food to feed a small army along with heaps of firewood and coal. This had been left by a recent Land Search & Rescue team. We soon had the fire going and Max let me out of his pack for 5 minutes.
Shit Weasels Love Fire
Sadly Spiderman reminded Max about the signpost. I got kicked out of the hut to spend the night in the toilet (Max once spent a night in a toilet too).
I normally love toilets but this one was cold. All the Shit was frozen and there were no rich scents to enjoy. How I hate the cold!
I wanted back in the Hut
Chomp Chomp
I nearly managed to chomp a hole in the door but I was beaten by the sun.
A Majestic Day
Spiderman & Max were very excited about the lack of wind and clag. They joked about how pathetic they would have felt if they’d woken up in a frosty hut down in the valley without a view! It was board-line gloating, but justified. It had been a fine effort the previous day.
Tararua range
Spiderman suggested that if we made it back to Mitre Flats Hut for lunch then we may bump into the timid trampers who had quit the previous day. Not that he wanted to rub it in or anything!
that way to the hut
We met the Timid trampers at Mitre Flats. Max was annoyingly bouncy talking about all the free food in the hut. None of the miserable trampers wanted to hear about how amazing the views were up on the tops so they quickly departed.
Spidermand and Max
After lunch we all set off again. We overtook the other trampers but the last one tried to keep up with us.
Spiderman commented how ridiculously tight his shorts were. It was almost indecent in a 1970s kind of way. The look was awkward like a teenager who had out grown his clothes and couldn’t afford a new pair!
There was no effort to strike up a conversation so we upped the pace a little so he soon got left behind !
2 hours and 5 miunutes after leaving the hut we were back at the car. Not a bad tramp but it could have been better. Like Max, I never want to spend a night in a frozen toilet again!
The Adventures Of The Shit Weasel 